Change was always hard for me, because I thought of it as endings and not new beginnings. I am moving to plan B. plan A proved to be only a childhood myth and not true life working together to fight White Nationalists. I am not angry anymore about the past. It happen. One can not change the fact that I never could find a way to turn my lemons into lemonaide.
Part of therapy was putting that boundary and accepting the results if there was no way that the wrong would be made right, and fate was made right. I know a lot of people don’t believe in fate or moral courage and honor. The world would be a better place if more people valued these things.
All my life I have had people say, think, and judge me as a a crazy loon who belongs in a padded cell, so no one would talk to me and listen to me as I tried to talk about WN and other topics that I think are important as a political daughter of the American Revolution. The truth is I am more sane then most people. I need TLC, but I am alright in the mind.
It is funny, but I remember telling a friend that I liked someone, and now all these years later I choose him for plan b. his bloodline also goes back to before the American Revolution. I wonder if he is SAR?
I also realized I don’t have to fear going back to Boston and facing my past. Things change over the years.
Still doing good with the weight loss.
I accept things as they are.
Sweet dreams and blessed be.