Am going to start posting again.

I know it has been awhile since I have posted here.  Going to start as I have some anger to get out my system.  Having Christian/Catholic friends on facebook I don’t share the witch stuff and sometimes I want to save it as I want to have it for my online book of shadows.

When I started this blog and my journey from White Nationalism I didn’t ever think things would have turned out the way they did.  I am glad I started the journey as 10 years later I am ready to embrace life.  Still have a lot of work to do, as my anger is not healthy.  Now that I know that root feeling and that feeling of wanting revenge, I can sort it through and find a way to forgive and movie forward.

Tonight a neighbor had to call the police because we were worried another neighbor might be dead.  Our mothers were girls here in Salina and knew each other from 13 or so.  I was feeling obligated.  A weakness of being a caregiver of everyone else.  Anyway, she is known by the police because she is a wino.  She is a drunk.  Her life is a mess and I had to admit to myself that I can’t help her.  She doesn’t see her red wine as a problem.  I don’t know what her rock bottom is. 

Something is going on but there is nothing anyone can do.  She is being evicted in a week and hasn’t even try to find a new place. 

I wanted help.  I wanted to heal from the PTSD.    Today I am so much better emotionally then I was before I started my journey 10 years ago. 

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