12 Feb 2013


This cottage is in Salina Kansas and I have always loved this home. I would love to find something small and cozy that has character and charm.

Yesterday I spent 4 hours in the dentist chair and I still feel like someone is still drilling…

Today I am supposed to pick up my mother’s ashes, but I will see if the pain in my mouth subsides.  If not then I will wait until tomorrow.

Don’t know where I am going to move to yet.  Been looking at homefinders.

I know I what some place small and cozy.  2 bedrooms so I can rent out one of the rooms, so I don’t have to live alone.  So glad I have my little Benji.  Want a place in the country near horses.  As I love horses and plan to start riding again for health reasons.  It is the only sport I am really good at.

Got a card from one of my mother’s NSDAR friends.  My mother was great at sports and loved golf.  She was also a great bridge player.  My mother was competitive.

I am competitive in my own way.  I love to race horses, cars, and win at games.  I love to play backgammon, uno, and other board and card games.  My dad wasn’t good at sports either and I take after him.  His one sport was sailling.  Mine is horses.

I am sure they have more rural parts of Ohau and one doesn’t have to live in Honolulu or other cities with lots of people around.  I don’t really like cities and never have.  I love the country with horses and trees, and nature.

I am looking for a small townhouse that has character that is pet friendly.

I haven’t given up moving back to Kansas or New England.  I like the Northwest too and Washington might be nice.  If I can find what I what at a good price, then start building equity, then in a few years I might move to Hawaii at some point.  Don’t know if they have what I am looking for in Hawaii.  Small townhouse in the country near horses or small cottage with a set up for horses on the property with a few stalls that I can use for my own horse and rent the other stall out to someone else for income.

I am not finished with the therapy yet, so I might stay in AZ for a little while longer until I finish.. I have finally found a program that is working with me, and I don’t want to take a chance in moving and then not find a program that works for me in the new place.  These people understand me and understand what works on me.  So I might stay here for another year before moving to Hawaii.

People tell me I shouldn’t move anywhere for 3 to 6 months, which seems very smart to me.

Another thing that is a con for me in moving to Hawaii is I would have to sell most of my things.  I don’t want to sell the things that my dad built, my mattress is brand new and I like my mother’s old headboard.  I have furniture that has been in the family for many years that I want to keep.  I have my paintings that I want to keep as I love art and I picked out each one and some I picked out with my mother…


I love this song.  I have heard it played on the radio the last couple of days when I needed to hear it.  Someday, the right man will come into my life, who will see the truth about me and will love me uncondtionally inspite of the emotional problems caused by abuse and trauma, who will see the best in me and not the worst.  Who will value that I love him uncondtionally, as he is.. Who will be happy that I only see the best in him and overlook the worst.  We all have good and bad inside of us… That is what makes us human. 

Yet, if we love someone uncondtionally we accept them as they are and don’t try to change them, because we are unhappy with certain qualities in them. Yet, if you are unhappy, it makes me wonder if you picked that person for who he is and you would still love him uncondtionally if he was poor and you had to live in a studio apt, or if you love him for the dream of what you think he should be. That is why I don’t understand these girls/women who say they love someone, but seek to change that person from the very onset of the relationship? They nag and nag and nag at the man for being who he is. At least I don’t nag at a man, as whoever it is I fall in love with, I will love uncondtionally and forever and I hope he will feel the same way about me.

Well, I will try and write later.




  1. 1
    chrisy58 Says:

  2. 2
    chrisy58 Says:

    The pain pill is working so I am going to go and pick up my mother’s ashes now.

    This is one of the best love songs ever written.

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