6 Jan 2013

Good morning. It is Sunday, so I play Beatles songs. Love the Beatles.

Hope you enjoy listening to the Beatles songs as much as I do. Also today on memory lane is the first showing of the tv show Mr. Ed. You remember the American tv show of the early 60′s about the talking horse. Loved that show.

As I said yesterday I support the British Government and believe in my heart that the Falkland Islands are BRITISH. I stand with the British Government and the people of the Falkland Islands against those who would try and force the people of the FALKLAND ISLANDS TO GIVE UP BEING PART OF THE BRITISH COMMONWEALTH.

If you are British or 1/2 British then I urge you to fly your Union Jack. You can hang it in your home, if you don’t have a flag pole to fly it on.. I have my Union Jack flag hanging on my wall in my room. Let us never let anyone tell us that we can’t take pride in our British flag and wave it in support of the British Government… Let the world know that we will stand with the people of the FALKLAND ISLANDS who want to STAY BRITISH.

That we will fight for the right for the UNION JACK TO BE FLOWN ON ANY BRITISH TERRITORY. LET THE WORLD KNOW THAT WE WILL NEVER BE ASHAMED OF OUR FLAG AND THAT THEY CAN’T STOP US FROM DISPLAYING THE UNION JACK, THAT SO MANY BRITISH PEOPLE HAVE FOUGHT AND DIED FOR. GOOD BRAVE MEN AND WOMEN DIED FIGHTING FOR THAT BEAUTIFUL FLAG. TO BE TOLD WE CAN’T FLY THAT FLAG ON BRITISH SOIL IS A DISGRACE.

A Bill was introduced in Congress that would give unlimited terms to be President to Obama or any other man/woman. Bad idea. Hope that Bill doesn’t pass and become LAW.

Yes, Obama would like to be King Obama I and be President until his death… Yet America was founded on the idea of having Kings and Queens. If they wanted KINGS AND QUEENS TO BE THEIR HEAD OF STATE, THEY WOULD HAVE STAYED PART OF THE UNITED KINGDOM…

I KNOW AMERICAN HISTORY IS NOT TAUGHT IN SCHOOLS AND THE NSDAR HAS DONE A VERY POOR JOB IN EDUCATING AMERICAN YOUTH IN AMERICAN HISTORY AND CIVICS, BUT THE 13 ORGINIAL COLONIES WERE BRITISH… IT WAS THE ENGLISH WHO BUILT THIS LAND.. THE MAYFLOWER WAS ENGLISH NOT AMERICAN.

THE FOUNDING FATHERS OF AMERICA WANTED TO BE FREE FROM THE RULE OF A KING/QUEEN…

SO WHY DO YOU AMERICANS SEEK TO MAKE OBAMA A KING WHO CAN RULE AS PRESIDENT UNTIL HIS DEATH? IF YOU ALLOW SOMEONE TO BE PRESIDENT FOR UNLIMITED TERMS THEN I BELIEVE YOU WILL LOOSE WHAT THE UNITED STATES WAS FOUNDED ON. YOU QUIT BEING A GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLE BY THE PEOPLE FOR THE PEOPLE AS LINCOLN WAS SAID IN ONE IF HIS GREAT SPEECHES.

Even though the United Kingdom has a Queen, HRH Queen Elizabeth II, she also doesn’t have absolute power. Many of the greatest nations today have based their Government on a British System of Laws.

The British system of Government is the best system in the world.

America is already a closed system of only two political parties the Dems adn the GOP.. Though the GOP is dying and we are quickly becoming a nation that only has one Political Party and that is the Dems. Third Parties do not have a fair shot of gaining or holding real Political Power in this nation.

Obama already has more power then Presidents before him and he is now seekng to have unlimited terms as President. This is just another reason why I think HE IS A POOR EXCUSE OF A PRESIDENT. I GUESS TO OBAMA ONLY HE IS GOOD ENOUGH TO BE PRESIDENT AND WON’T ALLOW ANYONE ELSE TO BE PRESIDENT UNTIL HIS DEATH. ARE WE GOING TO HAVE 5 TERMS OF OBAMA? HE IS IN HIS 50′S SO WE COULD HAVE AT LEAST 4 OR 5 MORE TERMS OF HIM. IS THAT REALLY THE AMERICA YOU DEMS WANT?

YOU DEMS WHO BROUGHT THIS BILL TO THE FLOOR AND ARE SEEKING OTHERS IN CONGRESS TO SPONSOR THIS BILL, DO YOU REALLY ONLY WANT OBAMA TO BE PRESIDENT AND NO OTHER? CAN’T YOU FIND ANYONE ELSE IN YOUR PARTY THAT YOU WOULD WANT TO BE PRESIDENT AFTER OBAMA FINISHES HIS 2ND TERM?

YOU CAN’T TELL ME THAT OUT OF ALL THE DEMOCRATS IN THIS COUNTRY THAT OBAMA IS THE ONE MAN WHO WANT TO BE PRESIDENT FOR UNLIMITED TERMS UP TO HIS DEATH? ARE YOU THAT INSANE?

THE UNITED STATES SHOULD HAVE STAYED PART OF THE UNITED KINGDOM LIKE CANADA. OUR FOUNDING FATHERS WOULD BE ROLLING OVER IN THEIR GRAVES IF THEY COULD SEE CONGRESS GIVING OBAMA UNLIMITED POWER TO BE PRESIDENT FOR AS MANY TERMS AS HE WANTS UP UNTIL HE DIES.

I HAVE WRITTEN OFF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY, AND THIS BILL INTRODUCED BY THE DEMOCRATS MAKES ME THINK THEY ARE JUST AS STUPID AS THE REPUBLCIANS. AND PEOPLE WONDER WHY OUR GOVERNMENT IS IN SUCH BAD SHAPE.. I KNOW WHY AMERICA IS IN SUCH BAD SHAPE, IT IS BECAUSE OF PEOPLE SERVING IN GOVERNMENT WHO DON’T HAVE THE WISDOM TO GOVERN.

Obama hasn’t brought forth a real budget since he has been President and you want to give this man unlimited terms up until his death. stupid.

I just PRAY that I can LEAVE THE UNITED STATES and MOVE BACK TO THE UNITED KINGDOM. EVEN IF I AM ON AMERICAN SOIL, THIS HALF BRIT, LOVES AND HONORS AND RESPECTS THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT.. I HAVE PITY FOR THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT BECAUSE THEY ARE SO STUPID.

YES, I THINK AMERICANS IN GOVERNMENT ARE STUPID. THAT CONGRESSMAN WHO I ASKED FOR HELP WAS STUPID TO NOT ASK ME ONE QUESTION WHEN I WENT TO HIM FOR HELP. HE WAS STUPID NOT TO TALK TO ME AND HEAR MY SIDE OF THE STORY BEFORE CONDEMNING ME TO REMAIN IN HELL ALL THESE YEARS. THE GOVERNMENT UNDER NIXON WAS STUPID IN REFUSING AIDE TO AMERICANS OVERSEAS WHO ARE IN DANGER AND COME TO THEM FOR HELP AND WERE TOLD WHAT I WAS TOLD BY THE GOVERNMENT AND THAT WAS F..K YOU. WHEN YOU SAY ” IT ISN’T MY PROBLEM” THAT IS SAYING F..K YOU.

WHAT ABOUT KENT STATE WHEN FEDERAL TROOPS MURDERED STUDENTS? THAT WAS A REAL SMART MOVE WASN’T IT.. MAKING THE YOUTH OF THIS COUNTRY LOVE AND RESPECT THE GOVERNMENT, NOT.

Been thinking about that CONGRESSMAN, who when I asked for help because I was being ABUSED OVER HIM, SAID F..K YOU AND REFUSED TO HELP ME… HIS SAYING ” IT ISN’T MY PROBLEM” WAS SAYING F..K YOU TO ME. I WILL NEVER FORGET THOSE WORDS. THE REALLY SAD THING IS HE HAS NO IDEA JUST WHAT HE DID, BECAUSE IN HIS MIND HE WAS JUSTIFIED IN REFUSING AIDE TO AN ABUSED GIRL WHO CAME TO HIM FOR A SAFE PLACE TO HIDE UNTIL MY MOTHER HAD COOLED DOWN OR BEEN PUT ON A PLANE BACK TO CAL.

ONE OF MY FAULTS IS THAT ONCE I LOVE SOMEONE AS MY FRIEND I LOVE THEM UNCONDITONALLY AND FOREVER. SADLY, THAT IS HOW I FEEL TOWARD THAT POOR EXCUSE OF A MAN OR NEIGHBOR/FRIEND.. YES, I THINK HE IS A POOR EXCUSE OF A MAN LIKE OBAMA. THEY ARE BOTH DEMOCRATS SO IT MIGHT BE A DEMOCRAT THING. DON’T REALLY KNOW IF THERE ARE GOOD DEMOCRATS WHO HAVE COMPASSION FOR THE ABUSED CHILDREN/WOMEN IN THIS WORLD, EVEN THOUGH THE PERSON BEING ABUSED IS CONSERVATIVE AND NOT A PROGRESSIVE DEMOCRAT LIKE THEM.

THIS IS MY PERSONAL JOURNAL TO HELP IN GETTING WELL FROM THE PTSD. THIS IS FOR ME TO GET OUT MY FEELINGS AND TRY SORTING THEM OUT SO I DON’T CONTINUE TO STUFF THEM DOWN WITH FOOD.

I LOVE THIS MAN AS MY FRIEND. LIKE MISS MELLIE WHO NEVER SAW THE BAD IN SCARLETT, MY HEART WILL NOT LET ME GIVE UP ON THE HOPE THAT SOMEWHERE DEEP INSIDE THAT POOR EXCUSE OF A MAN/HUMAN BEING IS A GOOD MAN/CATHOLIC… AND THAT SOMEDAY WE CAN TALK TOGETHER ONE ON ONE AS CATHOLIC TO CATHOLIC AND MAKE REAL PEACE AND GIVE EACH OTHER THE SIGN OF PEACE AS CATHOLICS AND MEAN IT FROM THE HEART. THAT THE FRIENDSHIP IS RESTORED AND IS EVEN BETTER. HE COULD DO A LOT WORST THEN HAVE A FRIEND LIKE ME WHO LOVES HIM UNCONDITONALLY, IS LOYAL, AND WOULD NEVER BETRAY HIM. EVEN INSPITE OF WHAT HE HAS DONE TO ME I STILL AM HIS FRIEND AND HAVE NEVER SOUGHT TO HURT HIM OR DESTROY HIM. I HAVE ONLY SOUGHT TO MAKE PEACE AND TALK THINGS OUT AND DO THE RIGHT THING. IT IS HIM WHO REFUSES TO DO THE RIGHT THING BY ME, BY EVEN ADMITTING THAT HE WAS LIED TO ABOUT ME, AND THAT I HAVE NEVER LIED TO HIM NOR WOULD I EVER LIE TO HIM. HE DOESN’T VALUE TRUTH LIKE I DO I GUESS.

MY HEAD SAYS TO GIVE UP ON HIM AND THE UNITED STATES AND JUST WRITE THEM OFF AS NOT WORTHY OF ME AND JUST LEAVE THEM BEHIND AND GO HOME TO THE UNITED KINGDOM.. I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN MORE BRIT THEN AMERICAN. MAYBE IT IS TIME TO JUST GIVE UP ON AMERICA AND AMERICANS?

I AM NOT YELLING, BUT AM A PASSIONATE WOMAN..

I NEVER THOUGHT WHEN I WAS A SMALL CHILD AND LOVED THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT UNDER PRESIDENT KENNEDY THAT THERE WOULD BE A DAY THAT I WOULD THINK THAT THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT AND THOSE WHO SERVE IN IT, SUCH AS A CONGRESSMAN WERE WORST THEN DRINKING THE VINEGAR THAT JEFF USED TO MAKE ME AND THE KIDS DRINK. TO THIS DAY I CAN’T EVEN STOMACH THE SMELL IT MAKES ME THROW UP…

GLAD THE PTSD THERAPY STARTS BACK UP TOMORROW…

THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME VENT MY FEELINGS.

Hope that if you too are an abused child/woman who suffers from PTSD, that you too will seek help. There is help out there.

Love
Chrisy

5 Jan 2012

Good morning. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

I miss having a horse to ride and getting excerise. Riding is good for the body, mind and spirit. Tia was an Arab and was so beautiful. Miss riding her as she was fast and loved to run. She had so much heart.

I stand with the British Government..The Falkland Islands are British and never were part of Argentina. The people time and time have made it very clear that they ARE BRITISH.

THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT IS THE BEST GOVERNMENT IN THE WORLD. HAVE KNOWN THAT SINCE I WAS 14 YEARS OLD WHEN THEY SAVED MY DAD’S LIFE, AFTER THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT UNDER NIXON TOLD HIM F..K YOU.. WHEN YOU TELL SOMEONE WHO COMES TO YOU FOR HELP THAT IT ISN’T YOUR PROBLEM, TO ME THAT IS SAYING F..K YOU.

I am so blessed that both my grandparents on my dad’s side were BRITISH. That my dad was considered BRITISH by the BRITISH GOVERNMENT WHICH MEANS I AM BRITISH TOO. VERY PROUD TO BE A DAUGHTER OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE.

I FLY MY UNION JACK FLAGS VERY PROUDLY AND WILL STAND BY THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT AND THE PEOPLE OF THE FALKLAND ISLANDS.

IF AMERICA CHOOSES A SIDE I HOPE THEY WILL TAKE THE SIDE OF THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT AND PEOPLE OF THE FALKLAND ISLANDS WHO HAVE MADE IT VERY CLEAR TIME AND TIME AGAIN THAT THEY ARE BRITISH. IF THEY CHOOSE TO GO AGAINST THE WISHES OF THE PEOPLE OF THE FALKLAND ISLANDS THEN SHAME ON THEM THEN I WILL LOOSE WHAT LITTLE RESPECT I HAVE LEFT FOR THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT WHICH IS VERY LITTLE AT THIS POINT.

NIXON WAS THE CAKE, A CONGRESSMAN IN MA, WHO I ASKED FOR HELP AND WHO SAID ” IT ISN’T MY PROBLEM” WITHOUT ASKING ONE QUESTION ABOUT WHAT WAS WRONG OR WHAT KIND OF HELP WAS NEEDED, AND TO ME THAT WAS SAYING F..K YOU; IS THE FROSTING AND OBAMA IS THE CHERRY ON TOP OF WHY I HAVE NO RESPECT, TRUST, OR LOVE FOR THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT.

THE LOVE, TRUST, RESPECT I FELT FOR THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT UNDER PRESIDENT KENNEDY WENT TO THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT AT 14 UNDER NIXON, AFTER THEY REFUSED TO HELP MY DAD WHEN HE WAS IN DANGER AND THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT SAVED HIS LIFE BECAUSE HE WAS CONSIDERED BRITISH BECAUSE HE PARENTS WERE BOTH BRITISH. MY GRANDFATHER FROM SCOTLAND AND MY GRANDMUM FROM ENGLAND. SO THAT MADE ME HALF BRITISH AND ONE OF THE HAPPIEST DAYS OF MY LIFE WAS WHEN I BECAME A MEMBER OF THE DAUGHTERS OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE.

For some reason I dreamed of Obama last night. Scary dream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was a nightmare. We were in Hawaii at the same time and we met and had a chance to talk…. In my dream he wanted to know why I dislike him so much and think he is a POOR EXCUSE FOR A MAN AND A PRESIDENT. I actually thought that showed real courage, and in the dream we actually talked like adults and told each other the truth. That is more then I have seen from the Congressman all those years ago who TOLD ME TO F..K OFF WHEN I ASKED HIM FOR HELP WHEN I WAS BEING ABUSED OVER HIM AND HIS UNCLE AND NEEDED TO BE REMOVED FROM THAT HELL FOR MY SAFETY AND WHO still refuses to face me and talk to me adult to adult and CATHOLIC TO CATHOLIC.

In my dream I told him that I thought he was a poor excuse of a man because how he has treated Hilary Clinton.. She is just one example of him not taking the blame but throwing others under him under the bus… I DON’T LIKE MEN WHO TREAT WOMEN DISHONORABLY… I feel he left her out to dry over what happen in Libya and other things that he has done that were not right in regards to Hilary Clinton.

I like Clinton, and my friend who used to live in New York told me how she had met Mrs. Clinton and what a kind person she was, who really cared about the people of New York and their needs and actually follow through in getting them the help they need. That impressed me because my experience with a Congressman was that those in the AMERICAN GOVERNEMNT ONLY SAY F..K YOU.

I have valid reasons for my dislike and distrust of the AMERICAN GOVERNMENT AND OBAMA. In my dream in talking to me and really listening and admiting his WRONGS, impressed me. I ALSO KNOW IT IS ONLY A DREAM AND NOT REAL LIFE.

IN MY DREAMS OF THE CONGRESSMAN WHO TOLD ME ” IT WASN’T MY PROBLEM” WHEN I ASKED HIM FOR HELP BECAUSE OF BEING ABUSED OVER HIM AND NEEDED A SAFE PLACE TO HIDE UNTIL MY MOTHER COULD BE PUT ON A PLANE TO CA, HE TOO FINALLY FINDS HIS BIG BOY PANTS AND COMES AND TALKS TO ME. YET, THAT WAS OVER 20 YEARS AGO AND HE STILL REFUSES TO DO THE RIGHT THING TOWARD ME AND TALK TO ME CATHOLIC TO CATHOLIC AND WE TELL EACH OTHER THE TRUTH TO EACH OTHER’S QUESTIONS. IN REAL LIFE HE STILL WEARS LITTLE BOY SHORTS AND RUNS AWAY INSTEAD OF FACING PEOPLE THAT HE HAS WRONGED, MISTREATED, MISJUDGED AND LIED ABOUT. YES, HE LIED ABOUT ME, BUT I AM WILLING TO GIVE HIM THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT THAT HE DIDN’T KNOW HE LIED ABOUT ME.. I KNOW THAT THE SAME EVIL PEOPLE WHO LIED TO OTHERS ABOUT ME, COULD HAVE BEEN LYING ABOUT HIM TO ME SO THAT I WOULD HATE HIM AND HIS FAMILY AS MUCH AS THEY DID. YOU SEE THEY DIDN’T WANT ME TO BE FRIENDS WITH THEM FOR SOME REASON. WAS IT BECAUSE THEY WERE AFRAID I WOULD TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT WHITE NATIONALISM?

I am getting away from my dream about Obama.

TO BAD IT IS ONLY A DREAM AND NOT THE REAL LIFE OBAMA THAT WENT TO PUNAHOE THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE AN HONEST PERSON WHO WAS WELL RESPECTED BY HIS FELLOW STUDENTS WHO AMONG THEM WERE MY NEPHEW’S UNCLES.. I GUESS I KEEP HOPING THAT A LITTLE OF THAT BOY FROM PUNAHOE WHO WAS TAUGHT GOOD VALUES THERE STILL EXISTS SOMEWHERE WITHIN THE MAN WHO SEEMS TO HAVE FORGOTTEN THE GOOD THINGS HE WAS TAUGHT WHILE GOING TO SCHOOL THERE IN HAWAII.

Sorry I don’t mean to offend people but this is my online journal and because of things that have happen to me in my lifetime that have caused me to develop PTSD AS A CHILD, I HAVE VERY VALID REASONS FOR MY DISLIKE, DISTRUST, AND NON RESPECT FOR THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT, WHICH OBAMA LIKE IT OR NOT IS THE HEAD OF. SO A PART OF THOSE FEELINGS I FELT AS A KID AND STILL FEEL BECAUSE OF MY TREATMENT AND MY DAD’S TREATMENT BY THIS GOVERNMENT IS DIRECTED AT HIM AS PRESIDENT OF THAT GOVERNMENT WHO IF YOU EVER GET IN TROUBLE OVERSEAS OR AT HOME AND YOU GO TO FOR HELP TELLS YOU F..K YOU. SO I GUESS AT 14 I DECIDED TO SAY F..K YOU BACK. ALL THE ANGER I FELT TOWARD NIXON I FEEL TO ALL PRESIDENTS SINCE HIM…

I THINK THEY ARE ALL LIARS, CRIMINALS, AND SCUM….

WHEREAS IT DOESN’T MATTER WHO THE PM IS I HAVE LOVE, RESPECT, AND TRUST FOR. I REALLY LIKE DAVID CAMERON AS HE IS A FELLOW CONSERVATIVE. EVEN THOUGH BOTH TONY BLAIR AND GORDON BROWN WERE LABOR, I SHOWED THEM THE RESPECT THAT THE OFFICE OF PM HOLDS.

OF COURSE MARGRET THATCHER WAS MY HERO, SO I REALLY LOVED HER. JOHN MAJOR WAS A GOOD PM TOO.

My point is that when that trust is violated and broken, that it is very hard to ever get it back.

Monday we start the ptsd therapy again. When I am healed, if I still feel the way I do, then I will decide what I want to do about giving up my Amerian citizenship and only being a BRITISH SUBJECT.

In my heart my GOVERNMENT IS THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT AND HAS BEEN SINCE I WAS 14 UNDER NIXON. Sorry, but that is the truth..

In getting better from the ptsd I need to be honest with my feelings and getting them out, instead of pretending and keeping them stuffed down with FOOD.

So if I offend Americans, then I am sorry.

Blessings to all who read this. May you not judge me to harshly for stating how I feel from my heart.

Chrisy

4 Jan 2013

Good morning. Posting a picture of George Washington today.

Would like to send congrads to a man who the last time I saw was a little boy, who has been sworn into Congress yesterday. You are a man now, and I hope you will be a great Congressman and be a Representive of the PEOPLE… You are smart, kind, and have a good heart and have compassion for others.. Don’t loose that.. Please listen to the people and never be afraid to talk to them one on one. Be fair in your dealings with all people.. If someone asks you for help don’t just answer it isn’t your problem without first finding out what kind of help they are looking for. You never know if your refusal to help that person causes them to be stuck in HELL. You might just realize at a later date, that they were trying to talk to you and wanting your help in fighting White Nationalist HATE, and you miss out on being a hero and protector to women and children in need.

I wish you the best and am very happy that you have grown into such a fine man. I wish your brother happiness too. It is hard for me to think of you both as all grown up and soon starting famlies of your own.

——————————————————

Feel like a little Tom Petty.

My mother has been very demanding today. She is trying my patience.. She can drive a sane person crazy with her crazy talk.

I feel like I want to fly away for a little free falling away from her for a week or two. Just having fun and enjoying life and not have to listen to her bark out orders and telling me she is going to die any moment, when she is barking out orders at me… I am not cold or cruel but I think as long as she is barking out orders and demanding this or that from me, that she doesn’t need 911 called.

Alot of things are just in her mind.

Yet, I am the one she alwyas said was crazy… I am actually the sane one.

I am learning with the ptsd that the problem child isn’t the problem but just the symptom of the problem within the family because we are the most honest… We act out the problem.. We are the scapegoat…

I keep on hoping that I can talk things out with an old American friend, as before I apply for my British Passport and renounce my American citizenship, I want to leave this nation without any unfinished business between us. We have things we need to say to each other and he needs to put on his big boy pants and face me and talk to me one one one. He is 60 years old, so he needs to start being a man and face me. I have never wanted anything from him but that he face me and we tell each other the truth and we give each other the sign of peace as Catholics. I mean the real sign of peace.. I STILL ONLY WANT THE TRUTH TO COME OUT AND THE RIGHT THING DONE. He needs to find the courage to face me a girl who has ptsd so even though I am a woman, emotionally I am still a girl… Because I am stuck in my childhood because of the trauma I have endured in this life. So it isn’t like I am a scary monster, but just a girl who need him to be a man and face me and we act like adult Catholics and talk things out with the goal of making real peace between us.

When that happens then I will be free to move to the UK and renounce my American Citizenship. I think he HATE ME, so you would think that would be enough to get this 60 year old man to put his big boy pants on and face me and we talk things out and hopefully end things on a good note for both of us.

I am the best friend he has ever had in this life and always will be… He COULD DO A LOT WORST THEN HAVE A FRIEND LIKE ME WHO LOVES HIM UNCONDITONALLY. I KNOW WE WILL NEVER BE MORE THEN FRIENDS, BUT I CAN BE HIS BEST FRIEND WHO TELLS HIM THE TRUTH, INSPITE OF HIS GETTING ANGRY WITH ME, BECAUSE HE NEEDS TO HEAR THE TRUTH… HE NEEDS TO HEAR THE TRUTH SO THAT HE CAN BE A BETTER MAN AND BECOME THE GREAT MAN I BELIEVE HE WAS BORN TO BE. I HOPE THAT EVEN AFTER I MOVE TO THE UK THAT WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS EVEN THOUGH HE IS AMERICAN AND I WILL BE ALL BRITISH AS I WILL GIVE UP MY AMERICAN CITIZENSHIP.

So my journal entry today is about FATHER and SON.

I WILL NEVER SAY WHO IT IS, SO PLEASE DON’T EVEN TRY TO ASK, AS I TELL YOU RIGHT NOW, I WILL LIE AND MAKE UP NAMES. DON’T TRY GUESSING, BECAUSE 90% OF THE TIME WHEN YOU ASSUME THINGS THEY ARE WRONG.

Someday I pray that my prayers will be answered and the FATHER will find it in his heart to face me and listen to the truth. May he realize I have never lied to him. Yes, he was lied to about me, but it wasn’t I who lied to him, it was others who lied to him. May the truth finally come out and justice be done after all these years AND HE BRING THE MUCH NEEDED RESOUCES TO THE FIGHT AGAINST WHITE NATIONALIST HATE.

PLEASE PRAY HE WILL FINALLY HAVE AN AWAKENING ABOUT ME AND DECIDE TO DO THE RIGHT THING TOWARD ME, SO THAT I CAN LEAVE AMERICA AND GO HOME TO THE UK, WITH PEACE BETWEEN US.

Love
Chrisy

My response to Mr. Greece

I have been thinking about your message.  It is not my nature to hurt others.

I know that you want to come to America and leave Greece, but I am not your ticket to America.  1.  I can’t buy you a ticket to America…  2.  We don’t know each other very well.  We began to chat on facebook and we don’t know each other enough to be in love with each other.  Who knows what will happen in the future?  We both would like to meet the right person who we can spend our lives with, but as I have said before I am waiting for Mr. Right.  Are you Mr Right?  I don’t know yet.  3.  Sometimes I think you come on to strong with saying you are my dream man.  I don’t know if you are or not.

As I have said before I am wanting to move to Skye.  If Romney wins tomorrow then I will give America another chance and put off moving to the UK.  If Obama wins then I will try to get out of America.

I am sorry but I can’t buy you a ticket.

Best Wishes

Christine

—————————————

I didn’t want to be mean, but at the same time, I tried to be honest with him.

Did mention how I felt in group this morning about feeling like he was out of line and crossing a boundry.  We will see if he defriends me on facebook…

Hope everyone is going to vote tomorrow.  I am planning on voting for Romney tomorrow morning.

Chrisy

Men!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do I have a sign on my forehead that says I AM STUPID?

On facebook I get an pm from this man from Greece.  We had chatted a little bit on the facebook chat this Summer.  I understand  he wants to come to the STATES, but I am not his TICKET HERE….

Here is the pm without his name:

you’re okay I like you.I want you.I imagine the rest of my life,to spend time with you.you help me to come directly to You.to your hause.I do not want money.Only one ticket from athens to you.I’ll come to you, and as soon as I begin to work, you’ll Back to return the money to give you.in love
Your dream man

—————————————

This upsets me, because how many American women is he doing this too?

I am not even going to respond to this.  Then that makes me a mean person, when I don’t want to hurt anyone, even someone who acts this way toward me.  I HATE being the bad guy!!!!!!

1.  This man doesn’t know me, he doesn’t speak English and I don’t speak Greek, Turkish or German so we had to use the english translation on facebook chat.  We have never met in person, nor ever talked on the phone or been talking on the computer for a long period of time.  How can he say he loves me or that he is my DREAM MAN?

2.  I am waiting for Mr. Right.  Haven’t been with a man since 2000 when I left Jeff.  So in Feb it will be 13 years.  My Mr. Right is not going to be someone from facebook who doesn’t know me, who hasn’t spent time with me in person, and who hasn’t looked into my eyes…  He isn’t someone who just wants to romance me for a ticket to America and to marry me for his green card.

Great his dream is coming to America.  Well, he is not going to use me to get here.

3.  I don’t even know if I want to stay in America.  I dream of going to the British Isles and think of moving to Skye.  With Romney I am starting to feel that there is hope and I might give America another chance.  If I do decide to stay in America then I would like to move back home to MA… Looking at places in Lynn and Scituate tonight on the computer.  Saw a couple of places on Haterly Rd in Scituate which is where I lived before near Minot Beach… Love it there.  There was an inn and resturant there on the beach but I think it was turned into Condo’s.  I moved because I couldn’t have a horse.  I loved Tia and miss her, but I should have stayed in Scituate and never moved to Marshfield.  But I can’t say that as everything happens for a reason and I guess it was meant for me to move to Marshfield and meet the people I met and go through what I went through…

I understand things are bad in Greece… But this is not the way to get to America.

Why is it that I only meet the frogs?  How many frogs do I have to meet before I meet my Prince?

Somewhere out there in the world there must be a nice man of my generation who would value the woman and would want me to be his best friend and helpmate in life.  Who see that I am a rare jewel who loves unconditonally and is loyal and not only has a good mind, but a good heart of gold, and courage.

I am so tired of the men who have no respect for women, who are players, who lie to get what they want, and pretend they love you when they don’t so that you will do what they want you to do.

I am old fashion, and I want to meet Mr. Right who I can submit and obey because he has showed me he loves me uncondtionally as I love him and is someone I can respect and trust.  Who will love, honor, and protect me as I will love, honor and obey him.  To strong willed so I need at least one person I will obey and stand up to me and be honest with me as I will stand up to him and be honest with him.  It is my choice to be in a traditonal relationship.

Mr Greece is not my Mr. Right.

The man who raped me when I was a little girl was Greek from Greece.  For a long time, I would stay away and not allow in my life anyone from Greece.  I decided that part of healing was to not judge all Greeks on the bad man who sexually molested me as a child, and so I talk to this Greek man on facebook and befriend him.

Then he pulls this crap with me.  Do I pull back from all Greeks again?  That isn’t fair, is it?  So I can’t do that.

Sorry for venting, but I have to wonder if there is any nice man out there who sees the true me and who would be happy and honored to have me in his life, to be my friend and lover?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVO7nj49odY

Crystal- Stevie Nicks

Think I need to stick with men of Celtic/American heritage or British men only..  I know White Nationalists men will tell me I am racist, but that doesn’t make a person racist to want to be with their own kind and not have to deal with those who are playing games to come to America or any other game they play…  I am half British so there is nothing wrong with me liking British man…

Will have to find a nice way to write this guy and tell him not to bother me anymore.  Why do I have such a kind heart?  I don’t know, maybe the best thing is to just ignore him and remove him from my friends lists on facebook?  Yet, I want to be treated fairly so I must treat others fairly.

Chrisy

Some Thoughts

We talked about depression today in ptsd group.  I don’t nor have I ever really suffered from depression. Each day is a new day for me and I wake up each morning with a smile on my face excited to begin a new day… Each new day is the chance to make it a better day…

They are moving so we aren’t meeting next week..

Been thinking that I wish I could be at the Conservative Conference in the UK.  Posted the highlights of day two and will post them everyday once the Conservative Party posts them on my facebook…. I really like David Cameron and think he is a good Party leader and a excellent PM..  I want to be there by the next election so I can campaign for him and vote for him to be re-elected and have a strong Conservative WIN against Labor…..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UhGAjV_zFE

Go the Distance- Michael Bolton

Well need to start thinking about starting the cheeseburgers we are having for dinner.

Someday I will get out of the United States and make it to the United Kingdom…..

I just don’t think my faith and trust in the United States Government will ever be restored… Don’t think they really care that by their ACTIONS and LACK OF ACTIONS THAT THEY HAVE HURT AND DESTROYED THE FAITH AND TRUST THAT AMERICANS HAVE IN THEIR OWN GOVERNMENT…. PRAISE THE LORD THAT MY GRANDPARENTS ON MY DAD’S SIDE WERE BRITISH AND THAT THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT SAVED MY DAD’S LIFE BECAUSE HE WAS HALF BRITISH WHEN THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT SAID ” IT WASN’T THEIR PROBLEM”, WHICH IS WHAT I WAS TOLD BY A CONGRESSMAN WHO PRETENDED TO BE MY FRIEND, WHEN I WENT TO HIM FOR HELP BECAUSE OF THE ABUSE I WAS SUFFERING…. THEN ADD THEIR LACK OF CONSIDERING AMERICANS AS HUMAN BEINGS, BUT AS ACCEPTABLE DAMAGE WHEN THEY MAKE EXCUSES TO THEMSELVES AND OTHERS WHY THEY HAVE SO LITTLE COMPASSION AND CARE FOR THEIR OWN PEOPLE….

THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT IS THE BEST GOVERNMENT IN THE WORLD…. I HAVE FELT THAT WAY SINCE I WAS 14 IN 1972…. WHEN UNDER NIXON THE GOVERNMENT LEFT MY DAD TO ROT IN ASIA AND THEY REFUSED TO HELP HIM AND THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT SAVED HIS LIFE, BECAUSE HIS PARENTS AND MY GRANDPARENTS WERE BRITISH…..

I AM BOTH SCOTTISH/IRISH AND ENGLISH… LIKE MANY SCOTS TODAY WE HAVE ENGLISH BLOOD INSIDE OF US, SO I DO UNDERSTAND BOTH SIDES OF WANTING A FREE SCOTLAND AND IRELAND, BUT ALSO UNDERSTANDING THE NEED FOR BEING PART OF AN UNITED KINGDOM….

I know Americans don’t understand me, they never have….. Some how I always get lost in the translation….

I always try to end things on a good note, so I do want to stop in Boston before I go and put flowers on the family graves there and see if I can talk things out with someone who needs to hear the truth and face me… I am a human being I deserve to hear the truth on a certain topic from his own lips.  I also deserve to hear why he didn’t help me that day in the barn when I was asking for a safe place to stay for a few days so I could stop the abuse from my mother.  He really needs to find the courage to face me or send his brother to face me for their FAMILY HONOR…. DON’T THEY HAVE ANY FAMILY HONOR OR COURAGE WITHIN THEIR FAMILY?  Sad, as his dad planted his seed in me when I was a child between 5 and 10…..

I have courage, and I pray that they find the courage too…..  We NEED THEM AND THEIR RESOURCES IN THE FIGHT AGAINST WHITE NATIONALISM…..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIYfgXKloMU

Glory of Love

have a good evening

Chrisy

To Gar

Not long now Chris, counting down the days!!!!!!

Gar.

————————————

I am so happy for you and your family Gar…

Here is a picture of Scotland to inspire you.

Someday I will get there too.

Went to ptsd group this morning and am waiting to take a couple of more stuff, so am working on healing so that I can move forward and go to Scotland..

Have a great evening.

Chrisy

Looking Forward

Getting in the mood for Halloween/Samhain.

Looking forward, and will continue to work on my plan of getting healthy and moving out of the United States.  I want to be in Scotland and be active in Scottish/British Politics.

I know Americans can’t understand my feelings and desire to leave the United States behind forever and to renounce my American citizenship once I have my British passport.  You see, I know once I get my British Passport the United States will strip me of my American citizenship.  When I go to Hawaii to spend time with my family, it will be with a British Passport and not as American citizen.  I can still visit my family in Hawaii with a British Passport.

The United States Government or should I say people who served in this government hurt me really bad.  Don’t know if my faith or trust will ever be restored.  As I said in group I want to live in a place that I respect and trust the government I live under.  Have no trust in the United States Government because of what happen to my dad and I when we went to someone who served in Government when we were in TROUBLE.  WE WERE BOTH TOLD IT WASN’T THEIR PROBLEM WHICH TO ME IS TO SAY GO TO HELL.

It will be awhile before I am able to leave this nation for good, so I guess there is always time for certain people if they care enough to make things right, to restore my faith and trust in them and this government.  I never say never, as when I say never it usually happens.  I always choose to try and look things from a view point of good can happen.  Truth is always found out in the end and if people are basically good inside and once they know they are wrong because they believed a lie, then I believe they will seek to make things right.  I don’t need an I am sorry, just them facing me and we talk face to face one on one, so that we can say what has to be said without airing our dirty laundry.  I need to talk to this person who refused to help a lady in distress about White Nationalism in America.  He can decide what he wants to do with the info.

With my years in White Nationalism, I could be a good resource for him if he ever decided he wanted to join the FIGHT and bring much needed RESOURCES TO FRIENDS OF MINE WHO PLAN TO STAY IN THE UNITED STATES.   Even when I am in Scotland I will help my FRIENDS here who FIGHT WHITE NATIONALISM.  WHITE NATIONALISM IS WORLD WIDE…..I can still visit them with a British Passport and they can come visit me in Scotland.

I don’t hold my breath that this person will do the right thing and even seek to restore the faith and trust in the government that he by his actions helped to strip away.  Nixon’s government also played a role in my thinking the United States Government doesn’t care one ounce about American people who are in TROUBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  My Congressman friend was just the icing on the cake, I guess.  I have never in my life been treated so cruel by any other human being when seeking a safe place to hide for a day or two from my mother who abuses me and makes my life hell sometimes.  I don’t know why this ex Congressman HATES ME SO MUCH.  Even White Nationalists showed me more compassion and helped me when I needed help.

I think in some ways I am like Anne Frank who tried to see good in everyone.  I try to see good in this person who I went to for help many years ago and he said it WASN’T HIS PROBLEM, when I was being abused over him.  Great guy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the stupid thing is that I still love him as a friend…… That is where my head tells me he is not worthy of my friendship and unconditional love, but my heart tells me that he just didn’t understand and once he knows the truth, he will prove that he is a true friend, who will face me and talk to me.

Just keep taking one step at a time, and someday I will be out of the United States forever.  though I do want to stop back home in Boston and put flowers on the family graves before moving to Scotland.  I won’t get lost in the translation anymore as I will be with other Scots and Brits.  There is a difference between the UK and America.

I am a little sad tonight, because I am still stuck in the United States and I want to be in Skye.  Yet, I know that it isn’t the right time yet, and when the time is right, events will unfold that will bring me to the place I can leave and begin a new life free and healthy from the PTSD……..  I will be able to enjoy life……………………

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=ZEx9O9x8Jnw

Layla-Eric Clapton

One of the best guitarists of my generation.

Have a good night.

Love

Chrisy

18 Sept 2012

Good morning!  Hope everyone has a good day.

http://www.number10.gov.uk/news/manchester-police-deaths/

“The killing of two police officers in Manchester is a shocking reminder of the
debt we owe to those who put themselves in danger to keep us safe and secure. I
want to offer my thoughts, along with those of the whole country, to the
families, friends and colleagues at this difficult time.” ( PM David Cameron)

It is with great saddness that I have to post that in Manchester, where my grandmum was from, that two police officers were shot and killed.  My thoughts and prayers go out to the families and friends who lost their loved one.

Those who know me, know I defend people I like and respect when they are being unfairly attacked.  Our PM David Cameron made a statement regarding the Manchester Police deaths and like always he is being unfairly attacked by those who think he can say or do nothing right.  He is even being attacked by so called fellow Conservatives.

I defended him on his facebook page..  People liked what I had to say so I guess there are other Conservatives who support him even if we don’t agree with everything he says or does 100%.  Have yet to meet the perfect political candidate or leader.  If you find them let me know, I would love to meet such a person. lol.

I am a proud Conservative( based on the UK) woman.  I want the Conservatives to do well in the next election.  Winston Chruchill was a Conservative.  There have been a lot of great Conservatives who have been PM and served in the Government of the United Kingdom who helped make the world a better place.  Who will go down in History as some of the greatest men and women who ever lived.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnuoGOo3Bew

God Save the Queen

I am half British and I am both Scottish and English.  I love both my Scottish and English side.  Love my Irish side too.

I have always been more British in mindset then American, plus add since I was 14 and the British Government saved my dad’s life when the American government told him to go to hell when in danger, I trust the British Government whereas the American Government I do not trust nor respect.

I want to live in a place where I trust the government so I will be moving back to Scotland at at some point.  I am a country girl who loves horses and ocean.  Scotland is more country and less people.  Besides I love my Scottish heritiage and Clan.  Clan Donald and the MacDonalds are a proud part of Scottish History.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SCSB_BiNSZo&feature=endscreen&NR=1

Andy Stewart- A Scottish Soldier

Love that song.

—————————————————-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=VDoO5vmBnsE

Mull of Kintyre- Paul McCartney

Enjoy

Garfield, I am so happy that your dream of moving to Scotland is coming true.  So close to achieving your life long dream.

You inspire me to make my dream of going to Scotland come true too.

Have a good day.

Chrisy

To Gar

Hoped you enjoyed your day, I booked my tickets today, we  fly 14th October to London, then 3 weeks holiday before we move up to Scotland. If I go silent during that time then you know why, but drop me a post at my addy and I will check in weekly if I can get the laptop to work in UK.

We’re all counting down the days and shedding tears with family at friends at the prospect of leaving, the kids go new homes for all their pets so its been a rough week.

Gar.

————————————————

I am sure it has been tough for the kids finding new homes for their pets, but I am sure they checked them out and made sure they are good homes.

I am sure it is going to tough to leave family and friends, but hopefully they will in the future come and visit or even move to Scotland too.  So excited for you.

Went to my ptsd group today and it was good.  I am healing and getting a lot better all the time.

Cutting and letting go of the toxic people and things in my life.  This Fall I am hoping to be more active socially.

Will email you with the address you gave me.

Chrisy